By burdening our ids with expectations and micromanagement , parents aren’t actually helping,  according to Julie Lythcott-Haims. The former   Dean of Freshmen at Stanford argues that parents should stop defining their children’s success with grades and test score. Instead, they should focus on giving unconditional love.

Who is She?:

Julie Lythcott-Haims speaks and writes on the phenomenon of helicopter parenting and the dangers of a checklisted childhood — the subject of her book, “How to Raise an Adult.”

Why You Should Watch:

            What are we doing to our children, when we say we want them to be happy? In this talk, she presents the damaging effects of conditional love and how it erodes self-efficacy.

Discussion Questions:

  1. What parenting style is messing up kids?
  2. What are the consequences of trying to force perfectionism on children?
  3. What is it like to be a checklist child?
  4. What message about conditional love are we giving our children?
  5. How does the message (see 4 above) affect self-efficacy?
  6. Discuss the major findings of the Harvard Grant study.

 Making Connections:

            Here is a link to an Amazon book, How To Raise an Adult:

Here is another parenting Talk you will enjoy:

Want a laugh?:

Are pclass differences in partening style disappearing:?




How To Raise Successful Kids Without Over Parenting With Julie Lythcott-Haims


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